Thursday, September 25, 2008

3 things you should know


My naive friend,

Your dreams of all party and no work are about to be shattered. After all the craziness of o-week you realize that university isn't all about play (unfortunately), but it is still a big part of Rhodes life. Here are three guiding points: things you should know before your journey starts; be prepared.

1) The three fatal ingredients to steer clear of if you really want to avoid first year spread. It’s no joke, don’t be fooled! Firstly, ‘toast’ is not just a cooked piece of bread, it becomes a social dining hall activity and filler when res food disappoints (so in other words you eat it every day). Note: even though the toaster flattens your toast like Melba, the thin appearance is an illusion. You’ll eat three times as much. Secondly, Pirates pizzas are the devil. Not only are they devilishly delicious, they often become your fourth meal after going out. Then of course there is ‘the BP run’ where their fresh, scrumptious but tiny and overpriced pies call your name as you walk out Friars at closing time, especially because everywhere else is closed. Toast, pizza and pies will have you rolling into second year with a few too many extra kg’s.

2) “Naps” – i.e. staying over in a guy’s rez, may seem like a good idea after a night out, but the next day you will have to face the walk of shame. If, however, you do have Naps, then try not to find a boy who lives on the hill, it’ll be a long walk there but seem even longer the next morning. Smuts boys are also said to be avoided.

3) Stock up on liver pills, Panado and Rehydrat. When reality hits you on the head (literally) the next morning, they’ll help you survive a day of lectures. Remember, after you’ve skipped one lecture it easily becomes routine – don’t go losing your DP!

Your now wiser buddy,

Jen xox

4 comments:

CruisersLac said...

I would like to applaud you (and your team) on the great graphics, layout, and name of your blog. This is what attracted my attention to the blog initially; however, it was the brutal honesty in your letter that made me laugh out loud. These are issues which all new first years experience and should know about so congratulations on saying it like it is. I’m sure these tips will come in handy for any soon-to-be Rhodent and a friendly reminder to any of us who do such things subconsciously or out of habit. Keep up the good work and I will definitely look you up when I am in need for a laugh or a bit of advice!

Jane

Yogenstein-Sker said...

Seriously articulate miss babalas, couldn't agree more. By the way, bloody cool picture.

Unknown said...

Thanks :-) did the graphics ourselves (courtesy of Nev, i.e. Mr Drunk!) We'll try keep the laughter coming so stick around!

katieb said...

Jen
What a fantastic letter, the language used is unique to Rhodes, such as,”BP run” and “naps”. You hit the nail on the head when you said that you always think it’s a good idea that night then have second thoughts the next morning when you have to face the walk of shame. I really enjoyed your sense of humour as it added character to the letter; which makes it very appealing to read. Particularly as you are dealing with serious issues such as getting drunk and the consequences the next morning, your advice is funny yet wise which is crucial as you have touched on all important issues including the infamous DP.
Katieb x x x